Cry Me A River
by Meowy Hime
Summary: Rinoa cheated on Squall, watching as the two cuddle on his flash car, a little perspective to see how he deals with the confusion of the situation. One big swearing bit but nothing else bad. Please RR.
1. Default Chapter

Cry Me a River

Author's Note: Spontanious, just love the track and hell everyone should know the frustration and hurt of being cheated so hey this is for all yal.

You were my sun, you were my earth  
but you didnt know all the ways I loved you, no  
So you took a chance, made other plans  
But I betcha didnt think that they would come crashin down, no

Squall watched from a fair distance as the ebony beauty caressed the taller boys face tenderly, smiling widely, more widely than he could remember seeing her for a long time. Her eyes full, sparking, bright. The older boy he recognised from Balamb stood beside his car and laughed lightly as a response to the sorceress' intimate gesture then watched as she curled up onto her toes and kissed him slowly, her lips slowly and gently pressing to his. Squall's whole world came falling and shaking like glass around him, slicing through his skin, the blood left to run while his tears could not.

Slowly, the seeD commander shook his head in disbelief resistively and looked down to the ground from outside the gates watching the scene of proof unroll in front of him. Rinoa still clueless as her 'boyfriend' stood back watching them rest against the guys red convertible. He refused to what any longer as the spike Rinoa had lodged between his shoulder blades continued to twist and turn within him.

You dont have to say, What cha did  
I already know, I found out from HIM  
now theres just no chance  
with you and me  
there will never be  
dont it make you sad about it 

Squall watched as she went about her normal daily routines in their small apartment, or what was considered big for seeD personal. The mousy haired boys eyes burning with betrayal and confusion, the sick undying feeling burning away inside his stomach, and the continuing twists of that knife in his back. She seemed unaware to the death glare he was shedding towards her, and the even worsen withdrawn and anti-social attitude. Was she so smug about what she was doing, what 'he' was doing for her in the other guys god damn bedroom? Did he buy her more than him? Was that it? The big flashy car? Did he treat her better, say he loved her more? This wasn't Rinoa's fault, no it was that other guy, he pressured her, yes of course that was it. RINOA wouldn't do that, NO WAY!

you told me you love me  
Why did you leave me all alone  
now you tell me you need me  
When you call me on the phone

"Rinoa…?" He stuttered, but she continued to wash the dishes as if she'd heard absolutely nothing.

And now right at this moment, that's exactly what he felt. The spineless bitch, if she wasn't happy why couldn't she fucking say something? The seeD's teeth ground together harshly, almost chipping them. How dare she, after all he'd done? Bought her that stupid bracelet, said he loved her, kissed her tenderly, given up his god damn pride. How could she have done this? It wasn't Rinoa, it couldn't be…

Girl I refuse  
you must have me confused with some other guy  
the bridges were burned  
now its your turn, To cry

Of course it was Rinoa, the bitch, ever since he'd met her he'd knew she was sneaky. All those things the seeD cadets had said, or whispered. All those rumours the girls had 'created' and got back to him. All those false smiles he'd been given from Rinoa's friends in garden. He was the god damn fool here.

Cry me a river  
Cry me a river er er  
cry me a river  
cry me a river er er  
YA YA

Was she laughing with her friends? What had she been doing for the past couple of months? Had she lied all those times she'd looked straight deep into his eyes and swore 'I love you', 'I'd die for you', 'I'll be with you and only you'…'I promise I'll be yours forever'? How could she had looked him in the eyes and lied so painfully, how did she god damn sleep next to him at night. What did everything mean to god damn her! All those times Squall had given his all, told her how he felt, protected her even at the risk of his own life. All those nights he'd tried to fight the intimacy shielding walls he'd built up, how many nights had he made more than just love to her? What did all that mean?

You know that they say somethings are better left Unsaid  
It wasnt like you only talked to him  
And you know it  
(Dont act like you dont know it)  
all of these things people told me  
keep messin with my head  
shoulda been honesty  
then you may not have thought it

"Rinoa…?" He muttered again, ignored once again.

His eyes burning painfully, why would she want to risk throwing away everything he could give her. He loved her! What did that other guy have that Squall didn't exactly? He'd done everything she'd god damn asked, was his everything just not enough? The hurt building more rapidly inside himself until he whimpered to himself and Rinoa noticed and turned with that stupid fake sympathetic look on her god damn beautiful face.

you told me you love me  
Why did you leave me all alone (all alone)  
now you tell me you need me  
When you call me on the phone ( call me on the phone)

Squall didn't want her to see she hurt him and turned his tears to anger, his brows knitting as he stood from his seat in the corner and looked at her deep in the eye. Fear rising through Rinoa's exterior he continued to glare at her now realising her'd quite clearly got her attention…

Author's Note: A very short story but hey, if anyone wants me to continue it to finish it off then I will if not too bad for me that I can't write good, lol. Thanks for anyone who did read. Like I said I'll keep writing if someone wants me too….R+R.


	2. Cry Me A River: Chapter 2

Author's Note: Due to popular demand I have decided to keep going with this fiction, I was pretty surprised at the response from people who read it but it was a pleasure surprise to say the least. So here ya go, (only problem being that means I really gotta make it the same way I did Cry Me A River and I'm not sure what you guys liked in that one but I'll give it a try). Thanks for all the reviews, they made me dance like a little happy puppy.

Cry Me A River:

Chapter 2

"Why'd you do it?" _Bitch…_ Squall spoke, and ended his sentence using the convenience and comfort of his own mental abilities.

Rinoa watched his watery yet still stern fiery eyes as they frowned ferociously. Her lip whimpered for a moment, feeling momentarily paralysed in this deadly glare of her knight. The nervous effects of her guilt began to make her body shudder, all the lies she'd told, all the flirtatious eyes she'd gave and the other man. Before she could even utter a pathetic attempt at playing dumb Squall's glare intensified as well as the tightening feeling in her gut, the plate she had been drying dropped from her shaking fingers. Shuddering as the pottery smashed against the floor, she felt the shards cut into her bear legs but still Squall didn't' react. Burning hate and hurt still present in those lone wolf eyes. The sorceress cringed at the loud noise the shattering created and the cuts it left in wake a long her limbs but only gave them one glance.

_God damn answer Rinoa…_He continued to curse in his head.

Squall continued to stare as the blood trickle down her legs, the cuts looked quite deep but he still held back the sympathetic pathetic side of himself that would usually get down on his knees and lap up the blood, kiss the very ground she stepped on, and remained angry forcing all that adoration down into the deep depths of his heart, the black dead bottom half of his heart. _Please just give me a reason than I can go…_

She looked at him, feeling the blood soak into her black socks, continuing to descend towards the floor…

_Why is she bleeding so much…? _Squall questioned again, flickering his eye shot down to her legs again where he'd expected only bobbles of blood to be created.

The ebony haired adolescent looked Squall clear in the eye and gulped hard. Gathering every scrap of confidence she had, her mouth opened slowly, the words began to form in her mind, a second later to escape her…

"I'm sorry…" Rinoa stood, her hands still shaking, clattering against her hips.

"Why?" His strong, unchanging almost monotone voice gave Rinoa the chills. She'd have been less scared if he'd yelled at her, stood and stormed over to her mid way through his sentence of abuse, she'd have preferred that expression of his hate. Not that unfamiliar hatred towards her, burning through her in the silence.

"I don't know." Rinoa mumbled, the question still echoing through the very depths of her own soul. Convenience? Unhappiness? Sexual? Selfishness? She knew the last one she was definitely guilty of.

Squall waited a few moments more before standing and approaching her, very slowly but very strongly. He wasn't going to buckle with tears and the hurt she'd created, but right now, under the cool exterior, the blood running was driving him insane. Trying his very best to keep his eyes off from her legs and refuse any kind thing he'd do for her associated with the cuts. She didn't god damn deserve it, but somehow some of that anger was melting away. It was through previous experience of rejection that he'd mastered this 'no surrender' ability.

Face to face, they stood for a little while, and without another word he walked just as strongly and sad less as he could master away from her, away from that intoxicating room, away from everything.

(Later…)

Squall watched from the pier at Balamb, as the ocean's waves calmly rocked with each other, the brilliant blue that the water claimed, changed along the surface in the distance as the suns crimson and orange settled along the edge of the world, the sky darkened along with the time. He continued to think, continued to wonder, trying to force all those images out of his head. The kiss against the car, and other intimate scenes he's mind had wickedly created to taunt him. More question and self doubt rambled through the little sobs he let free. This wasn't enough to pluck away the hurt she'd buried deep inside of him.

"Squall?" He heard a soft familiar voice.

Gulping hard he looked towards the distance and continued to stare hard without a word. He didn't feel like talking to anyone right now, he didn't want to tell anyone about what Rinoa had done and how much of a fool he was for letting her into him, deep into him.

Quistas slid by him and relaxed herself, sighing heavily at the realisation that Squall had returned to his very closed in self, the man she used to know. The man she'd loved from far away, and even through all of the lies of her own mental conclusion of sisterly love, she'd always felt the sting over Rinoa's arm around the knight.

"How you feeling?" Dumb question of course but what else could she say?

Moments later through an awkward silence she continued…

"She's an idiot." The instructor continued.

It only just became apparent to Squall that this meant Quistas had known about the other relationship between the two. The high ranking seeD officer stood up quickly from his position, without saying a word and stormed from her. He didn't want to be near anyone, he didn't trust anyone. Why hadn't he listened to all those stupid rumours? Why hadn't he listened to the Galbadian and Timber boys telling their stories? How could anyone master such deception.

As he was storming away he heard Quistas call him name but he continued to pass a head ignoring her. Now where to go? Back to garden? Back to his and Rinoa's dormitory, she would be there and that was the last thing he wanted to do. Confront her, she might have come up with several more hurtful lies. Any time she opened her mouth now it would hurt. Did she even care? Did he care if she did? He began to wonder whether she was getting all the sympathy from everyone else because he'd found out. The thought sickened him. More questions of why…

Author's Note: I'm sorry this chapter sucked so much, it was supposed to sort of bridge t the drama of the next one. So I'm also sorry it too so long and its so short, thanks for all the reviews again, you guys are great!


	3. Cry Me A River: Chapter 3

Author's Note: Sorry I took SO long to write this one, I suck, but it's longer though you guys will be pleased to hear, at least I hope!

Chapter 3:

The image of the blood trickling down Rinoa's leg would not leave him, but neither could the image of her body against that other guy disappear either, both equally contributing to the loss of sanity he was experiencing, slowly but surely. Now back at his apartment with no Rinoa in sight at all, he lay alone on his bed and rolled over several times subconsciously, unable to find comfort in the furniture. Lack of rest and food did not taught him the way he understood it would have Rinoa if she were in his position right now, again his thoughts linked to her and only of her yet again. Still angry and bitter but not as dismissive of pondering on the sorceress he continued this scenario, Rinoa would have jumped to her psychical needs right away, grabbed the closest chocolate bar, called up a few friends, got it all out. Right? What's what good old Rinoa would do.

What was he supposed to do when she stumbled home later on, to grab food to cope with the guilt he hoped rotted through her? Smile and wave, ask how she's doing and say 'hunni, it's ok, I'll slip the ring on your finger and we'll forget all about this awful misunderstanding, and wait at the alter of our wedding while you lick your lips and wink at a guy on the third row from the front as you pass down the aisle to me, then screw him in the toilets after we've taken our vows during the reception, it'll be JUST FINE!'

Gripping his tough hands through his mousy locks, he breathed out in frustration then rubbed his temples between his fingers in attempt to cute the pounding head that surged through him, the tension slowly rising in his shoulder and neck creating the aching pain and discomfort he felt currently. Whenever Squall thought too much he got headaches, or tension pains, and he couldn't ever stop tossing and turning, or thinking, it was just impossible for anything to just stop!

Did she want that guy more than she wanted him, was she going to leave for him now? Was he supposed to kick her out any way? Or forgive her and pretend as if everything is ok, slowly they'd get over it? Was he supposed to trust her ever again? She wasn't all his, others had touched her body, all those promises were so empty and haunting now, so hollow.

Figuring he wasn't getting any where with just lying here, and obviously he wasn't going to get any rest or peace of mind by lying here he slowly picked himself up to get a drink, nothing alcoholic, Squall wasn't like that, but something that would cut the thirsty dry flesh within his mouth. The irritating sensation had finally gotten to him and he wanted something else to concentrate on.

Was she with him now?

Cursing under his breath, he was reminded of the frustration he felt, he did not want to think about her and what she was doing. She wasn't worth the time, worth the effort, worth anything, right? Is that what everyone else would say to him? Was that right? She was still a human right, and no one deserves anything they don't want? Did she think she could just walk all over him, wrap him around her little finger. The truth was she probably could, something else he was horrendously ashamed of. The control she had over him, another thing people had bitched and asked about. How much she had over him, he wasn't a weak person. No he would stand up and protect, he could fight to the very end, but when it came to Rinoa everything changed. Maybe his reason for being strong at the moment was her, maybe she was his reason for fighting to the very end. Did she deserve that loyalty? Probably not, in fact definitely not, but that didn't change the fact that she had his loyalty…but he didn't have hers.

Leaning over the kitchen counter he whimpered for a few moments, out of hurt and jealousy a tear rolled down his cheeks. And as he opened his eyes, he saw a spot of blood on the floor. Rinoa's blood.

More tears spilled from his eyes, more whimpers escaped from his pale soft lips…why?

The door clicked a few times, and the grinning of metal alerted Squall that someone was turning the handle from the outside. Immediately he dried his dark eyes and felt his heart begin to pound wildly in his chest, almost painfully. The now fast rhythm of his heart was the only thing Squall chose to listen to while watched the handle turn. His posture returning to normal, and the stern features turned back to the normality. Creases created around his browns, and heavy bags shown more obviously, the knight geared himself consciously to endure the thrashing it would cause his confidence and heart if Rinoa was to walk through that door right now.

Trying to convince himself of instructor Trepe's words he continued to glare harshly, every second passing by feeling like an hour, cursing inside for this moment of absolute terror and tension to pass Squall breathed in slowly. The door slid open very smoothly and quietly, and the familiar but unfamiliar raven haired girl stepped through the frame into eye sight of the seeD commander. Eyes connected, not one of them moved.

Gulping audibly, Rinoa looked away for a moment, her hands shaking violently. She had taken a trip to see Selphie, to admit what she had done, and to find the reason or convince herself of the reason why. The only way she could explain it, it was…his fault. How exactly was she supposed to say that exactly? 'I blame you'. Even she knew that was unfair, but she also knew if Squall wanted her out he'd need the clarity, and it was all that she had to give him, this pathetic reason.

Slowly, she closed the door behind her with her pale hands, not looking once behind her, keeping her eye level with Squall. It was admittance time…

"Squall." Rinoa began. "I'm so sorry, it didn't mean anything and I was just angry." She paced towards him a few times, but still didn't come too close, afraid not of any abuse, but ashamed to move any further.

"I didn't even know what to think, at first I didn't believe it…" Squall replied, no emotion present, just the monotone.

This scared Rinoa more than anything, he was building up his shell again. The years she'd spent digging away at that shell, the years they'd all spent digging away at it. How hard and gentle it had been, how caution and careful she had been. It was too late to reach for the shell-less Squall now, he was encasing himself within it too quick for her to grip him hard and pull him out. He'd be unprotected, and now when she understood how brittle he was from the emotion he'd rather die than choke on, it'd be too dangerous to pull him out of it.

"I was angry with you." Rinoa continued, stepping on very uneasy ground.

"What?" He bitterly quirked, his eye brow raising in surprise and disgust.

"You…you didn't go out with me this week at all, went out with someone else." She stuttered and started, so embarrassed with her pathetic reason. "You never really show me you give a damn."

Was she twisting this on him? Part of him wanted to scream out at her then, part of him did blame himself and agreed with her, part of him didn't like to argue and told him to remain silent and just listen. Push the anger down for another day. Secretly Rinoa was begging for Squall to argue back, make her feel small and horrible and stupid and ashamed, like he should make her feel. Yet all he did was stand there and watch her, the mild emotion he had had on his face before had now melted away and he was back to just a normal expression. Why wouldn't he fight against her?

"Look, if you wanna break up with me I won't stop you, I deserve it after all." Rinoa continued, she'd always thought this was a really lousy thing to say. If you've been hurt or cheated on they should take the negativity that they feel and slam it back in the evil persons face, make them feel as low as you did. So offering the person hurting exactly what they can use to hurt them was a slack thing to do, but Rinoa was sorry and did understand if he wanted to leave her. Was she to let him make an enemy of her for a while, until he'd gotten all the anger out, and felt better about the situation.

He slowly shook his head…

"No…I don't want to do that, I need you." He replied.

Rinoa's eyes widened for a moment, this comment had scared her the most. He was accepting, wanted to stay with her? This was all wrong, wrong! He was suppose to feel angry with her, so that she didn't have to feel so bad, feel as if she was getting away with it…

"B-But…Squall…" She murmured weakly.

To Be continued…

Author's Note: Sorry this was another short chapter, the next one is gonna be really long and all, and reflects the consequences of Squall staying with her and blah-de-blah. Thanks you guys for reviewing! I love it, love it! Keep coming, it's really encouraging!


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